Welcome to Psychology Circus!

            You probably don’t know this, but psychologists have a great sense of humor.  They are really very funny.  The make excellent clowns.  Only problem is, they’re so serious about psychology that they don’t know how funny they really are.  So I thought it was time for someone to let the world know.

 

            You can get an inkling of just how funny psychologists are when you listen to some “expert” on the TV or radio as he weighs in on the events of the day.  You have to listen very carefully, or you’ll miss the joke.  You’ll hear some psychologist say, “Victims of Hurricane Katrina were found to exhibit many symptoms of depression.”  Wow!  Do you think that a victim of a disaster, who has lost many worldly possessions and possibly some loved ones, might feel a bit depressed.  Yet they deliver this statement with a completely straight face.  Steve Carrell couldn’t have done it better.

 

            Take mental diseases, for example (nowadays they call them disorders).  Psychologists and psychiatrists have invented hundreds of mental disorders and can’t cure one of them.  Talk to them about cures and they immediately start to sound like President Bush trying to explain why he invaded Iraq.  Could it be that the reason they can’t cure any of those mental disorders is that none of them really exists?  Perhaps there is no such thing as a “mental disease”.  What a fine joke that would be!

 

            A tremendously fertile area for unintended psychological comedy is phobias.  For example, did you know that one of the official phobias catalogued and studied with intense gravity by the psychological profession is Arachibutyrophobia.  And what exactly is Arachibutyrophobia?  Fear and dislike of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth.  I couldn’t have thought of a joke like that.  It took a psychologist. They have a knack.

 

            Everyone knows that psychology is the study of the mind.  The joke is that psychology doesn’t study the mind anymore.  They study brains and behavior and sensation and childhood development and a host of other specialized subjects, but no psychologist actually studies the mind.  In fact, increasing numbers of psychologists have adopted the viewpoint that the mind doesn’t even exist.  What a gag!  To think that the Study of the Mind, Psychology, doesn’t even study the mind.  But as usual with psychology, there’s another joke on top of the first.  Even though they don’t study the mind anymore, they still say they are the experts on the mind – and if another group tries to actually study the mind, they squash it.  You can’t help but appreciate humor like that.

 

            Or take our schools.  Remember when children learned phonics.  Well, the psychologists have pushed hard (and pretty successfully) for a method of reading they call the Whole Word Method, also called the Look-Say Method.   The idea is that the child should learn to recognize a whole word rather than pronounce it out, as he or she used to do.   Given that the phonetic alphabet was one of the ground-breaking inventions of the Western world, the abandonment of phonics has naturally resulted in a calamitous decline in the reading skills of school kids.  Interestingly, this has been coupled with a radical increase in kids being diagnosed with dyslexia or Reading Disorder.  The joke is that the psychologists have created this rampant increase in the mental disease called Reading Disorder by rampantly pushing the Whole Word Method.  Pretty funny, huh?  A little bit like a dentist giving his patients bags of candy.

 

Or here’s another big prank from the field of education:  Our schools, lobbied by the pschiatrists (and their pals, the pharamaceutical companies), are drugging millions of school children with powerful, mind-altering, addictive – and expensive – psychiatric drugs.  This is to cure new-fangled, scientific-sounding mental diseases like ADHD and Bipolar Disorder.  These drugs have terrible side-effects, including violence and suicide.  So we find the amazing spectacle of thousands of children killing themselves and their schoolmates, and all the result of these same psychiatric drugs that the schools are forcing on them as cures for their mental disorders, often over the objections of the children’s parents.  And the bigger joke is that the shrinks have the gaul to come in after a disaster like Columbine and lobby for even more money to drug even more children.  You see what I mean when I say that shrinks have a great sense of humor?

 

The examples could go on – in fact, they will go on.  This web site is dedicated to giving psychologists the credit they deserve for being the masterful clowns that they are.  I want to cultivate in you, dear reader, a taste for their over-the-top, kinky humor.

 

As for the victims of all this mental health clowning – the patients with the failed cures and the ruined lives and the suicides, the school children who can’t study, the rejects of the mental health system haunting the sidewalks of our cities, the businesses that are being driven into the ground by their psychology-dominated Human Resource Departments, and so on – well, as anyone knows, every joke must have its butt.

 

Franklyn L. Wright